I was told that my partner was seen kissing someone at a Pride party. I wasn't there, there's no photo proof but I'm concerned. I trust him but I wonder if something happened. What should I do?
Bitch. What a bitch. OK, we can't jump to conclusions. But, I will ask if your source is someone you trust. Are they 100 percent certain it was him? ONE HUNDRED PERCENT. Are they honest with you about everything all the time? If so, confront your partner. If need be, name your source and say who spotted him. If he admits to it and kissing someone is a red line for you, then it's over. Period.
Communication is key, but timing is everything. Wait until you’re relatively calm before confronting your partner. When you do, approach the conversation with a desire to understand, not just to accuse. Ask him directly about what happened. Was it a momentary lapse in judgment fueled by alcohol and the party atmosphere? Is there a deeper issue at play?
Think long and hard about your non-negotiables. What are your boundaries? What are you willing to accept? And, more importantly, what are you not willing to tolerate?
Trust your gut. Ultimately, nobody knows your relationship better than you. After you’ve taken the time to process your emotions, gather information, and reflect on your needs, trust your intuition. Does his explanation feel genuine? Do you believe he's truly remorseful and committed to repairing the damage? Or does your gut tell you that this is a pattern of behavior?
Repeating from the beginning: if your red line is kissing someone else, it's done. If you waffle, he'll know you don't stand your ground and will get away with more in the future -- especially if he knows it worked before.