Confession time: I’m a creature of convenience. Not the kind that meticulously plans out every minute, optimizing for peak efficiency. No, I’m the kind that eyes the overflowing laundry basket and thinks, “Hmm, maybe that’s a job for Future Me,” then immediately opens a food delivery app. Because, let’s be real, the entire premise of these glorious modern marvels – be it Instacart, DoorDash, Uber Eats, or the burgeoning legion of "someone else doing it for you" services – is the noble act of outsourcing the mundane.
My brain is perpetually on the hunt for ways to avoid actual thought exertion. And grocery shopping? That, is a special kind of exertion. It’s not just the physical act of pushing a squeaky cart down an aisle designed to funnel you past every impulse buy. It’s the mental gymnastics of remembering if I actually have enough butter, the existential dread of picking the right avocado, and the sheer societal pressure of pretending I’m not judging your questionable outfit choices in the canned goods aisle. (Don't get me started on your shoes.)