My mom keeps trying to set me up on dates
I'm single and my mom keeps trying to set me up with people. She doesn't know my type and she's picking people who aren't even close to my style. How do I tell her to piss off?
My needy partner constantly fishes for compliments
I'm in a new relationship and it seems like my partner is constantly fishing for compliments. When he makes food, he's always asking how it is. When we go out, he asks if I like his outfit. The first couple of times it seemed like he genuinely wondered how I felt but I've caught on that it's his way of forcing me to compliment or say nice things. It's kind of driving me insane already because it's coming across as needy.
My partner won't stop posting thirst traps
I'm in a newer relationship but my partner is still posting thirst traps. It's bothering me that he still seemingly wants attention from his adoring fans. Is it wrong to ask him to change his needy habit on social media?
His mom won't stop cock-blocking us
I have a rule with my partner that we don't use our phones when we're on dates or out for dinner or whatever. The one exception for him is his mom. It's not that she's sick or there's an emergency but I think she does it to interrupt because it seems to happen a lot coincidentally when we're out. He still lives with her so obviously she knows he's not home but I can't help but thinking she's cockblocking on purpose.
He wants our dog wearing diapers on walks to bathroom train her
My partner wants our dog to wear diapers when we walk her. She doesn't have health issues but he feels that's a good training technique. He believes we're above walking around the neighborhood carrying a bag of dog crap after she does her business. He doesn't want her going to the bathroom during walks. "We don't work for her," he says in regards to carrying around her bag of doo. She doesn't need to wear a diaper for walks. It looks ridiculous. A diaper doesn't stop going to the bathroom it just catches it. It doesn't make sense.
Do I mention others I'm talking to on a dating app?
I'm new to dating apps. I realize most people are chatting with more than one person at a time. I'm debating about how open I should be. Do you talk about other connections and conversations you have? Or should you keep your other interactions private? Is it cool to say, "Yeah, I'm talking to this other person who..."?
My partner wants us to vacation... with his mom
My partner wants his mom to vacation with us. I like her, I can tolerate her but I have no interest in travelling with her. We booked our vacation time at our jobs six months ago and she was never mentioned then. All of a sudden she's being brought up in the last couple of weeks. I don't know if she asked to come along or if she was invited. I'm totally not into her coming with us. What's the way out of this?
I'm turned off by my partner's nasty teeth
I like everything about my partner... except his teeth. Not only does he have giant gums (think "horse teeth") his bottom row is all out of alignment. It's not something I noticed right away because our first few hangouts were on video chat and then we were out doing things when we first met so we weren't exactly face to face talking. Once we did settle down for a cuddle night I was looking and once I noticed it I couldn't stop looking at his teeth. And I think he caught me because he was talking less after and wasn't moving his mouth as much when he talked. What do I do now?
I can't handle my man wearing nail polish
My partner is starting to wear nail polish and it's a turnoff. I really can't get over it. It might seem minor but I associate that with women and I'm not attracted to women or femininity. I'm a guy who's attracted to guys. Nail polish, purses and all that woman stuff doesn't fly with me. Do I put my foot down and draw the line or just see where it goes with him?
New relationship: chew dis?
I'm in a new relationship and it's been going great for a few weeks. The dates have been casual (walking the dog, going for evening drives, etc.). We just had dinner together for the first time and I'm kind of annoyed. I can't stand how he eats. He chews with his mouth open and chews loudly. He also goes "ahhhhh" after he has sips of drinks. Do I say something early on or just deal with it? I like him otherwise and I don't want to come into this relationship telling him to start changing things. But it really annoys me. A big part of relationships is having meals together so I don't think this is something I can avoid in the future. What do I do?
My partner wants us to take lie-detector tests
My partner joked that we should take a lie-detector test just to see what it's like. It seems like he might have an ulterior motive. I'm wondering if on the surface it's meant to be something silly just to see if we could "beat it" and get away with lies but I think he's fishing. Maybe he doesn't believe my past or the current state of our relationship. What is the line of questioning? If we do it, should we agree on the questions beforehand? My partner is different like that, frequently having off-the-wall ideas so it doesn't surprise me he would come up with something like this. This one just seems weird and he's mentioned it a few times already.
My partner wants us to go to a nude beach
My partner wants us to go to a nude beach. I've noticed he's getting more and more comfortable walking around the house in little (or no) clothing. It's not that he's embracing a nudist lifestyle I think he just enjoys the freedom of not wearing clothes. It's one thing to do it in the privacy of our own home but to do it in public is new. It's only him who's walking around the house undressed, I'm not participating. I have no issue with him doing it in the house. He's wanting to take it to the next level now and show off in public. I'm certain I wouldn't strip down on a beach no matter how much "everyone is doing it" pressure might be put on me. I'm just not sure about other people seeing my partner naked. You don't know who has a camera out there and will be capturing shots and whatever they might be doing with them. What should I do?
My partner wants to mix our friend groups
My partner insists on mixing our groups of friends and I prefer keeping them separate. For instance (I'm making up these names): I'm friends with John and Mary, and he's friends with Bob and Susan. He wants us to get together as a group of six and do dinner or a night out somewhere. I have nothing against Bob and Susan but I just don't feel like mixing our friends. I feel like it'll be awkward because I have inside jokes and stories with them that the others wouldn't understand or find funny. They're just two different couples. It's not that I feel like they won't get along I just want my friends to be my friends and his friends to be his friends. What should I do?
He's addicted to expensive concert tickets and wasting money
My partner loves music and is a diehard concert-goer. I'm concerned about the money he's spending on concert tickets. It's not that he goes to the concert it's that he goes for the most expensive seating areas and says it's the full experience. He won't go for cheaper tickets at the back because you don't enjoy the concert the same. And depending on who the concert is, he might even travel to go see it or buy a bunch of souvenirs. So between that and the cost of tickets, he's spending so much. I'd rather he be saving money for our future (house buying to get out of our apartment, etc.).
I can't tolerate cameras everywhere in social settings
I find that I don't want to go to parties or social events with groups of friends because I don't want to end up in everyone's social media posts. As I scroll social media this summer, I see everyone's pool parties or beach days and all the unsuspecting people in the background. It's not that I'm up to no good but I just don't need everyone seeing where I am on the weekends. There should be designated phone and no-phone zones at these events. I don't want to be in the background of your photos while I'm shoveling my face with a plate of food behind you. Why are people inconsiderate about others' privacy? I feel like I am headed for a life of being anti-social.
My unemployed partner needs to take a job -- any job
My partner lost his job and has been actively looking for work. (It was a layoff, it wasn't his fault.) It seems like he can't land a role in his field of expertise. I'm telling him he should just apply for anything in the short term because income is income and he needs to start pulling his weight. It's not for lack of trying it just seems like he's stubborn and feels that taking any other job is beneath him. Should I ease up? Am I being unreasonable?
My dumb-ass ex works with me now
When I came into work on Monday, the HR person brought around the new people who were just hired to give them a tour of the building and introduce them to everyone. One of them is my ex. We didn't give any indication that we knew each other but obviously we're going to cross paths around the office. He hurt me badly by cheating and then after the break up tried turning people against me. I'm sort of worried his immaturity will spread to this professional environment. I've worked here for years so people know who I am and what I'm about. Should I let people know the deal so that if something does start happening they will have been aware?
My partner is one of those obnoxious goons at sporting events
My partner gets too into sports at events and acts like a goon. It's one thing to cheer for your team but now he heckles the opposing team's fans and I'm worried it'll escalate if he razzes the wrong person. What should I do?
His humor is beginning to cross the line
My partner has always had a bit of a crude sense of humor. Lately with all of the events happening in the country (deportations, racism, civil unrest, politics, etc.) he's making comments that are perhaps crossing the line with certain people. He's not being racist per se but if you don't know his personality or how he jokes, it could definitely be taken the wrong way. I think some people are starting to get bad vibes from him. How should this be addressed?
They think he's trying to be funny, but he's serious
My partner tries to impress people with useless pieces of knowledge (remember Cliff on Cheers?). He's not doing it to be funny but people think he's trying to be and it makes for awkward moments. He's being serious but they don't know how to take it and start laughing. They're essentially laughing at him. He's genuinely trying to share his knowledge but it does come across as a know-it-all or even sarcastic sometimes. I know him so I know what he's trying to do. They don't so it's weird. Any advice?
They were nice while I was there, now I'm ghosted
I stayed at a bed and breakfast a few years ago and the owners (a couple) were super nice. I was traveling alone for work so they kept me company and checked in on me, even had me over for meals sometimes. We actually bonded. It almost seemed like a friendship. On my Facebook memories it's showing me that visit from four years ago. I thought it would be nice to send the couple a message (they're somewhat older but their property is still online) to say hi and tell them how I still remember that trip fondly. I've emailed twice and never heard back. My first instinct is they were just nice for the sake of doing business and don't actually care about me. Then I thought something happened to them (illness, death, etc.) but see they're still pictured on their website. How should I feel about this? I feel ghosted.
I can't cope with my co-worker's stinky lunches
My co-worker has the most obnoxious-smelling lunches and always eats at her desk. Most of us are annoyed by it. How do we get her to eat somewhere that's better ventilated so we don't have to gag every day?
My co-workers copy me on every email
I'm one of the growing office workers who can't stand being copied on emails that don't pertain to me. It's fine if it's an FYI to something that might affect my work at some point. But there are people in the office who copy so many people on messages to make them aware -- but then also don't explain why we're being added, so it's always unclear if something is expected of us or what the real reason is. I'm tempted to write back something like "Why am I getting this?" but it might come across dickish. Do I just ignore them or say something to prevent more clogging of my inbox?
Should I finally give up on ungrateful birthday snobs?
There are so many people I call or text and wish happy birthday to (one is my cousin) and I don't hear back. I don't just post something on their Facebook page when it reminds me it's their birthday. I actually know when it is and I reach out. I've drifted apart from some of the people but there hasn't been anything bad that's happened between us to consider it a troubled relationship. We just don't talk as often as we did. Do I stop calling and sending texts? It seems like they're unappreciative. It's one thing to respond to every comment on a Facebook page but to get a personal call or text I feel is a bit more special. I actually call and leave my cousin voice mail. I don't hear back from her. Surely these people have time to respond with "thanks!" Thoughts?